Sure you’re intelligent. But are you emotionally intelligent?


Last week I shared about self-awareness and how it’s always the first step in any personal development journey. Today, I want to go a bit deeper and focus on an important facet of self-awareness: emotional intelligence.

Emotional intelligence is the ability to understand and manage your own emotions, and likely influence those of the people around you. People with a high degree of emotional intelligence constantly have a check on their emotions: knowing what they’re feeling, knowing what their emotions mean and recognizing how their emotions can affect others. Having emotional intelligence is essential for your career success. After all, who’s more likely to succeed: someone who shouts at their peers when under stress or someone who stays in control while calmly assessing a stressful situation.

And just like any set of skills or knowledge, you can improve your level of emotional intelligence. Here are a few ways to do that.

Be vulnerable.

People are much more likely to want to work with someone who brings their authentic self to work. Be real – that means being candid about how difficult things are (without being overly negative) and about how positive other things are. People need to know that you’re on the same journey with them. They feel stronger when they know that you’re in the same boat, or on the same common ground, as they are and are going through the same experiences together.

Practice empathy.

Empathy has a few different components: mental awareness (understanding others’ experiences and perspectives), communication (what you say and how you say it) and physicality (observing tone, body language and gestures). Consider these as you interact with your peers, your leadership and your customers. People are more willing to collaborate with those who know and care about them as people. Even just asking someone what help they need can go a long way in making them feel valued and supported.

Communicate effectively.

Failing to communicate effectively can lead to frustration and confusion among your peers, or even worse, your customers. Professionals with high emotional intelligence have a greater ability to influence, persuade and connect with others. But a major aspect of that comes from knowing how to effectively communicate with others. Always ensure your full message is being received and understood without assuming others simply understand things the way you understand them. When you communicate effectively, it’ll remove obstacles and encourage collaboration.

Be self-motivated.

Self-motivation relates to your internal drive. Emotionally intelligent professionals understand the deeper meaning of their goals (Your Why) and the self-motivation skills needed to achieve them. When you show up to work self-motivated, it’s like a new piece of equipment being delivered with the batteries already included. No one has to take the time and effort to charge you up (and draining themselves in the process). And when you’re self-motivated, it’s a lot easier to encourage others in their work.

Emotional Intelligence isn’t easy to achieve. Nor is it easy to always have it 100%. But as you work to become more aware of, and further develop, your own emotional intelligence you’ll be much more successful.

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